I WAS WRONG! Whew, okay, I admit it. I screwed up. I said some things I shouldn’t have, I definitely forgot your name, and I didn’t consider your feelings. I see that it hurt you, and I won’t do it again. There, I feel better; I said it. Don’t you feel better too? You know what I did was wrong, you know that I’m sorry, and you know that I won’t do it again. Now that we’ve talked it out, we can both move on from this conflict and on to the next thing.

Okay, so you’ve pissed somebody off, and now you’re avoiding them. I totally get it; it’s so much easier to hide under a rock. After all, who wants to be told off? Literally nobody, that’s who. But believe it or not, when someone expresses frustration or vents their feelings, it is often a sign of genuine care. Individuals who are ready to sever ties typically do so without further communication. Every interaction, even if heated, presents an opportunity to address underlying issues. Surprisingly, some of the most insightful feedback comes from dissatisfied clients who care enough to voice their concerns, unlike the silent majority who quietly disengage.

So many organizations have a blanket policy of never admitting they are wrong, and I get it; they want to sound professional. Maybe they think admitting to being wrong sounds weak. But think about the last five people who did something awful to you. Would you forgive them if they just apologized? Would you settle for them simply stopping doing whatever it is they did in the first place? I’d hazard to guess that if you look at your history, you are going to find at least three people that you were desperately angry at for a time and who you’d like to reconnect with if they just apologized. If you refuse to admit when you are wrong, then it’s likely you’ve hurt and frustrated quite a few in your network.

I suggest this: when you screw up, tell somebody what you did wrong and what you plan to do to fix it. If they can’t understand that, then they aren’t worth your time. But in the same respect, if you can’t admit it when you are wrong, then you aren’t worth their time either. The world may seem vast, but it’s actually quite small, populated by a select few who stand by us. If you’ve found your tribe, cherish and nurture those connections by hearing them out.